President Hinckley goes to India

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, we believe in prophets on the earth today. The recent passing of Gordon B. Hinckley, our prophet and president of the church prompted me to to write down the thoughts below:

I've been having various conversation lately with fellow expats and missionaries overwhelmed with India and the task of spreading the Gospel in this land. I will admit to feeling overwhelmed many times myself.

We felt like we were barely getting by last summer when news came that our branch was going to be divided. Just a few months later in November 2007, the New Delhi mission was formed, and about 20% of our branch was split off again into a Noida home group on the other side of the river that falls under the branch but meets separately and requires even more leaders.

I have taken comfort and perspective in the example of our late prophet. I'm sure that many countries can say this, but Indians feel in many ways that he is the father of the Church in India.

President Hinckley first came in December of 1964, at a time when there were no members of the Church in the country.

There was a brother named Paul Thiuthuvodoss in south India who had come across some Church literature more than ten years earlier and had been writing the Brethren desiring baptism. President Hinckley, who was an Apostle at the time, went and visited him to see what should be done.

Hinckley's wrote the following about his visit in his personal journal:

I have been so tired because of little sleep and the heat that I have not felt alert. We returned to the hotel and lay down for an hour and went fast asleep. The rest was most refreshing.

After a light dinner, we got in the cars to travel out into a rural section to attend a meeting. Paul and his associates have five meeting places where they hold outdoor meetings among the poor. This has been an unforgettable experience. We drove about ten miles out of Coimbatore into the rural areas where the dust is thick and people are miserably poor. The men are field hands who earn 30 or 40 cents a day working 12 hours. The women get about 20 cents. There are many children – 11,400,000 born in India each year.

As we came into a little opening were there were a few trees, Paul’s associates were playing the organ and singing and beating a drum. It was just like a Salivation Army meeting. The people began to gather. Some two or three hundred gathered and sat on the ground. They had taken two cots and put rough blankets on them, and we sat on these. A hymn was sung which we did not know. It was sung as the Indians sing with their particular type of musical arrangement. President Quealy then offered prayer and Brother Paul interpreted his prayer. I was then called on to speak, and I did so for a few minutes with Paul interpreting.

Paul then spoke to them in the Tamil language. He was followed by Job, who gave a regular Pentecostal sermon which we did not understand. Some of the old men seated on the ground in front nodded their heads in approval. The congregation was very reverent. These were surely the poor of the earth. They appeared to have little or nothing. As we met with them I thought of Jesus speaking to the multitudes. The benediction was offered by Brother Robert Evans with Paul translating.

We then drove to another meeting in the opposite direction. We were more than an hour late in getting there. As we entered a place through dark, narrow, dirty streets, I saw a sight the like of which I have never seen before. A great crowd of people, perhaps 400 of them, were singing in a compound. They had decorated it with paper streamers. A fluorescent light and a gasoline lantern attracted the bugs. Signs reading “welcome” were seen in two or three places. A picture of John F. Kennedy was nailed to a post and another of Nehru.

When we drove up the people came over and gathered about us till we could scarcely get out of the cars. These were dirty, hungry, poor people, but they had an eagerness in their eyes that was wonderful to behold. Perhaps 200 children sat on the ground before us with their elders behind them. I spoke briefly through an interpreter, Paul spoke, and Job spoke. We had been so late coming that it was now 9:00, and with so many children present we felt that we should be brief. When we left to go, the people again gathered about the car and took our hands.

We returned to the English Pub and had something to eat. My thoughts are greatly troubled over what I have seen. I do not know what we should do. These are earnest people, but they have been schooled in the Pentecostal ways, which are not our ways. Furthermore, the task of working among the poor of India is so great that I do not know where we should start. We certainly need the inspiration of the Lord in whatever action we take here. (qtd. in Palmer, Spencer J. The Church Encounters Asia. Salt Lake City, 1970)

Even a great Apostle and Prophet felt overwhelmed when he came here and said, "I do not know where we should start." Certainly those of us who have come to India have felt this way upon arrival, and all of us, whether we are in India or Indiana, at times are totally and completely overwhelmed by that which stands before us.

How President Hinckley handled the situation is a lesson. He chose not to baptize Brother Thiuthuvodoss at that time:

I earnestly sought the inspiration of the Lord as to whether we should baptize these people....

We then returned to the hotel where I talked with him at length. I told him that I felt he was worthy to be baptized. He has read much of our literature and seems to understand the doctrines of the Church thoroughly, but he knows nothing of procedures. I wondered whether we should baptize him and him alone and not the others, this might have the effect of dividing his group. I told him that I felt inclined to go home and recommend to the Brethren that we permit two missionaries to come here for a period of months and work with him and his associates, training them in the procedures of the Church, so that if they left they could go forward as an organized branch. I think he would be worthy to be ordained an elder after a few months.

He seemed disappointed that we were not inclined to baptize him but said that he felt that this was the wise thing to do and that he would readily accept our judgment. For more than ten years he has wanted to be baptized. We talked at length about the doctrines of the Church, and he seemed to understand them. However, after attending the meetings last night, I have been greatly worried lest they slip into some kind of Pentecostal method of conducting meetings. They need help in the procedures of the Church, and we have felt that we might do a great injustice by baptizing them and leaving them to drift.

I go to sleep somewhat troubled in my mind over not performing the ordinance in his behalf, but fully satisfied that good has been accomplished by our coming here and that the end results will be very much worthwhile and in harmony with the Lord’s will. I would hope that a branch might be established here of people of what we might term the middle class and that as they become strong they can bring others into the Church, including the poor. This we have explained to Brother Paul. This marks the end of our visit. (qtd. in Palmer, Spencer J. The Church Encounters Asia. Salt Lake City, 1970)

When faced with such an overwhelming situation, President Hinckley did not panic and run away. Nor did he jump in and try to do everything at once. He took a wise and measured approach.

And he took action. Brother Paul Thiuthuvodoss was baptized less than one month later by President Quealy (the Asia area mission president).

Missionaries traveled from Hong Kong and taught Paul and a group of investigators. The story of the baptism is told by one of President Quealy’s missionaries Steve Iba. On the day of the baptism before boarding the bus to go to the lake, they offered a prayer:

In the prayer, offered by President Quealy, he asked the Lord that there would be sufficient water for the baptism to take place, which was puzzling to him because he knew there was a large lake earlier identified for the baptisms to take place.

When the bus drove over the hill to the valley of the lake, he was astonished that the lake was completely dry. They wondered what to do. A young boy with a cow came out of the brush. President Quealy had Brother Thiuthuvodoss ask the boy if he knew where there was some water. The boy led the group to a mango orchard with a pool of clear water. They then began to baptize when a man started shouting at them from a hill overlooking the orchard.

Brother Thiuthuvodoss went up and spoke with him. He quieted down and then brother Thiuthuvodoss returned to the pool to be baptized. President Quealy asked him what the problem was with the man. Brother Thiuthuvodoss said that they were on the man’s property and should get off. I then explained to him what we were doing and he realized that it was a holy thing and it would be ok.

The man then explained that normally the water would not be there at that time of the day. He explained that he harnesses up his oxen each day at noon and then pulls the dike on the pond releasing the water for his orchard, but that day, as he was yoking up his oxen, at noon time, one of them bolted and he had been chasing the ox ever since. He further said that he had never had an ox bolt. President Quealy said that it was at noon when he prayed for there to be sufficient water for the baptisms to take place. Truly the Lord is watching over his work as it begins in India. (From the journal of Stephen K. Iba, March 1965, qtd. in Palmer, Spencer J. The Church Encounters Asia. Salt Lake City, 1970)

And so, under President Hinckley's direction, the first member of the Church in this era of the Gospel in India was baptized.

The church has grown steadily here ever since. I look in wonder at what has happened even in the two years since we have come. The two branches and about eight young full-time missionaries when we arrived is now three branches, three home groups, and about 30 missionaries. We have our own misson, with a mission presidency that sits right here in Delhi.

Still, just as when President Hinckley first came, the approach is measured. We still only teach and baptize people who speak sufficient English, which excludes the vast majority of people here. It will be an amazing thing when the gates open for the gospel to be taught in the native languages of India, but the foundation must be there first.

The final time that President Hinckley came was in August of 2005. At that time he expressed his great love for the members:

I first came to this nation 41 years ago when there was not a single member of the Church, and I have been back many times . . .

Coimbatore, Madras, Bombay, and New Delhi, and wherever else in this vast and wonderful nation which is making such tremendous progress at the present time. And a part of that progress is because of the growth of the Church here. Because every time there is an added member of the church, there is a better citizen of the nation of India. Because our people become better people. They become people of greater strength and capacity. They appreciate one another more, they serve one another better. And so every time we bring another convert into the church, we strengthen the nation of which it is a part.

I just want to say to this congregation here that I love you very very much. I am not a citizen of India. I am a citizen of the United States, but I think I have a love for the people of this good land and the people of the world. Every man and woman, every boy and girl, is a child of God. And as such is my brother and she is my sister, and I honor and respect him or her.

You and I are brothers and sisters. We come from different lands, different racial strains, but we are all children of our Heavenly Father in Heaven, and must respect and honor and help one another as we travel through this life together.

Now just in conclusion, as I don’t suppose I will ever come to India again. I’m an old man. 95 years of age. Crazy to go around the world when you’re 95. We’ve been in Vladivostok Russia, we’ve been in Korea, we’ve been in Taiwan, we’ve been in Hong Kong, tonight we are in New Delhi. Tomorrow we're in…let’s see…Kenya. Kenya tomorrow. Then we're in Nigeria, where we’ll dedicate a new temple. Then we’ll be in Rome, then we’ll be in Paris, then we’ll be home if we make it.

Well, let me just say again, how much I appreciate you, how much I love you, how much I honor you, how much I pray for you, how much I respect and honor these wonderful missionaries here, these senior couples, and all those who are engaged in the work of the Lord in this great land.

I must not take more time, some of you have a long ways to go to get home.

God bless you. God bless you my beloved brethren and sisters. May heaven smile upon you. May you have food on your tables, and clothing on your backs, and a shelter over your head, and peace and kindness and love and faith in your hearts... (transcribed from the DVD recording of the conference, August 2005)

The members of the Church here love President Hinckley. For the vast majority of members he is the only prophet that they have ever known.

And for those of us who are here from far away, we take lessons from his example. It is natural to feel overwhelmed, but when that happens we go to the Lord. We can, like President Hinckley, be measured and wise, but move forward with conviction. And most of all "love, respect, and honor" the great people of this sacred land.

For those of you who are interested in more details, I've put up citations, the full text from the journal entries and a more complete transcript of his August 2005 address to the saints of India at this link. A short history of the church in India can be found here.

Pull Your Ears and Squat

While Merinda is out having fun on the beach in New Zealand, it is now up to me and me alone to hold down the fort and tell the things that need to be told.

This morning our night guard knocked on the door. He held his earlobes with his fingers and squatted up and down three times while pleading in broken English, "Sorry sir, sorry. Very very sorry." He then put his hands flat together in a praying motion, bowed, looked at me right in the eyes and said, "Please sir, please...."

I fired him anyway.

So speaking about holding the fort, our house is kind of a little fort. There is a wall with spikes on the top that surrounds our small front yard, a driveway, the garage with the servant's quarters on the top and the main house. Sitting in a chair outside through the freezing cold and burning sun 24 hours a day is a day guard and a night guard.

The guard's duties are the following:

• Open the front gate when anybody leaves. Much of the time they will salute as the car goes by.

• Open the gate when anybody comes. The car will approach the gate and honk. We will hear the pitter-patter of footsteps running if he is far away, the bolt will slide open, and there he is. Since there are cars honking all the time, he has to know the particular honk of our car or he will wear himself out.
  

• Turn on and off the water pumps early in the morning when there is water to be extracted from the city water supply. Since the water only runs a few hours a day and there is no water pressure, it has to be pulled from the system into a big tank under the house in the early morning hours and then a second pump pulls it from there to a smaller tank on the top of the house. The tank used to be black, ensuring that there was nothing but steaming hot water in the summer until we finally paid Margaret the cook's husband to go up there and paint it white.
  

• Turn on and off the generator when the power goes out. He has had to do this manually ever since the automatic switch broke.

• Raise the alarm if there is ever an emergency. Since he has no radio or mobile or access to a telephone of any kind what this means is that he would blow his whistle. We don't know what would happen after that, but I bet it would be interesting. There's a whistle thing here I've never been able to quite figure out. What I do know is that all night long there is a guy riding around the neighborhood on a bike blowing a whistle loudly at regular intervals. My guess is that there is another guy listening and if he doesn't hear the whistle when expected then he would assume his buddy has been captured, and then, I don't know, maybe he blows his whistle, but in a different way that causes all the other guards join in blowing their whistles: louder and louder they would blow, more and more joining the fun, until the bad guys can't stand the noise anymore and run away.

• An unofficial duty is to play with the kids while they are outside. While Graham was learning to walk the guard would follow behind him squatting down with arms outstreached so he never would hit the ground. They kick the ball with them, go get it when it goes over the fence.

They can do other things too. We used to have them grind wheat back before the hand grinder broke. A friend of Merinda's taught her guards how to knit and they sit and knit sweaters for needy people. They won't sweep or clean, that's a caste notch or two down from where they are, but they do watch the sweeper do her thing.

4:30 yesterday morning, the phone rang. It was American Airlines delivering my lost suitcase. They were at the door, but couldn't get in. Somewhat annoyed at the timing, but happy to get it back, I came downstairs wondering why the guard hadn't let me know he was there. There was no guard to be found. I checked around the front, in the servant's bathroom, back where the water pump is, and he was nowhere.

Finally I opened the closed garage door and there on the ground the guard had made a bed. He was fully under the blankets. I stood there right above this, he blissfully unaware of my being there, while I thought about what to do. We've caught guards sleeping before in their chairs next to the gate, but making a bed was going a bit too far.

So I ripped off the blanket from him and shouted, "Hey, wake up and open the gate!!". He quickly stood up and then stared blankly into my eyes for a few seconds while his brain started up, and then sprung into action and ran for the front.

It turns out that pulling your ears while squating up and down is something that teachers make kids do if they've been bad in class. (They also make kids squat, hook their arms through their legs and hold their ears. Try it. It's not easy, I just had it a shot at it and fell over and hurt myself.) This is not something adults typically do, but I guess it's all that he could think of to punish himself for his mistake.

But since he had been caught in his garage bed several times before by Margaret the cook, I decided to fire him anyway.

The first person we ever fired was a little toothless old guy from Nepal who would put his hands together and bow low every time he saw us. He came with the house and didn't speak a word of English. When we moved in, we weren't sure what we were supposed to do with him, he was just staying up in the then-empty servant's quarters. We agonized over this for days and we finally asked the landlord's man what he was there for. We found out that he was just some random guy off the street that he brought in to watch over the house while it was empty and that if we could use him that would be great, but if not just to send him out.

"Just send him out?", we thought. What will he do? Where will he sleep? Will he starve?

But we didn't know what else to do and so we gave him some extra money and sent him out. He didn't seem angry. For a long time after that we saw him every day, brewing and selling tea on a little patch of ground just in front of the gate which was probably what he was doing before he stayed at our house. Seeing him somehow helped us feel a little better, like he was still alive and OK, until eventually we didn't see him anymore.

Since then, I've fired lots of people. I fired a driver for peeking at the maid while she was showering. I fired another one for selling fuel out of the gas tank.

I fired the guard in the picture on the right because he was too chummy with the people outside and let a really creepy one into the house once when the sewer backed up.

They say that you learn a lot about yourself from living in India, and you don't always like what you find out.

There are a things that really bother me about the firing of this latest one. One is how easy it was for me to do. Each time I send somebody out, I think less and less of it. But much, much worse is this:

He worked for us for months. Opening the gate, shutting the gate, turning on the water pump, off the water pump, on the generator, off the generator, playing kickball with the kids, fetching the balls from over the fence, day in and day out.

I didn't know what his name was.

I couldn't even tell him by his own name to leave my house.

When I think of why we are staying in India, one reason is that I want to conquer this cynicism, and learn to hurt for these folks again, even if firing them sometimes is the right thing to do. I look at the compassionate gaze in the eyes of our resident cousins, the Pulsiphers, and think about how I used to be like that. People take advantage of that look, but does that matter?

Because I just know that in the next life I will be standing in front of some of these good people. I'll pull my ears, squat, and have to say "Very sorry, very very sorry, please..."

A Survey of Indian Engineering College Students Desk Grafitti

Dad just took a quick trip to BITS, Pilani, a college campus in the wilderness of Rajastan, to do some recruiting. After barreling through five hours of thick fog in the dark through the bumpy country roads and a few hours sleep at the local guest house we arrived at the campus.


I often think about how lucky I am not to have had to fight my way through the tough school and college entrance process that these good people have to do. Now after seeing the job selection process for these "freshers" I think about how lucky I am not to have to had do that either.

After putting on a short PowerPoint presentation about our company (including data about the starting salary) we give an hour and a half written exam in a FREEZING cold room:


About half of these students were sitting for my software exam, out of which the top three or four were to be selected for a face-to-face interview. While wondering around waiting for the students to finished, I noticed the grafitti on the desks.

Now when we think of grafitti back home, the themes I can remember typically run like this:

• Somebody's name
• Somebody's name with their girlfriend.
• Gang-related scribbling
• Doodles
• Unspeakable obscenities

So to further probe the psyche of this young and vibrant country, here are some examples of Indian College Student desk grafitti from with some accompanying thoughts. I put these in order of the amount of each type that I saw:

1. Technical Doodlings

Lots of Matmatical Formulas

Some C code

An electrical circuit

I asked some students what this was all about. Was this a way to cheat on exams if you happened to get the right desk on test day? It didn't seem like that kind of scribbling and the students said that your chances of writing down the exact right problem were not that high anyway.

What they said was that on a lot of their tests, they are not given any scratch paper and they end up working things out directly on the wood of the desk instead.

Lesson: Even in the face of scarcity, these students are able to make do...or they cheat a lot in obvious ways.

2. Multinational Company Names

Microsoft- Mahish Babu

Wipro happened here

Preeti, Priya Dipu, Rimpy, Rakhi : Got ekas (first) job offer: Infosys, ..., Scomain

Lesson: This was really interesting. These students have beaten all odds, one out of thousands, working harder than you or I can ever imagine to get into a place at a good school like this one. The ultimate pinicle of their success will be landing a good job at a multinational company, making a starting salary of ten to twelve thousand a year, living the good life.

When sitting in a boring class they dream of days ahead, doodling on their desks the names of these companies like we would doodle the name of a high school girlfriend, lovingly circling the name, filling it in: Wipro...Microsoft...Oracle... *sigh*

3. Inspirational

Information Systems Association Prestya - Where Excellence is the Criterion!!!

Will Miss U BITS Pilani

Dare to dream - Care to achieve

Paul Priya Aarthi - Friends Forever

Lesson: One thing we love about India is how unabashadly sentimental it is. It's a very nice break from all the cynicism and sarcasm that is around these days. The actors in the movies still burst into song, run through the fields and hug trees. And why not? Dare to dream! Care to achieve!

3. Doodles

RIP: In memory of all the people who have died of boredom in this class.

The swastika here is a Hindu symbol of God (not a Nazi thing)

Lesson: In this regard, we are all the same. When class is boring, might as well draw a picture. When the exam is tough, calling on the powers of heaven by drawing some religious symbol may be your only hope!

4. Love

Some like one
Some like two
I like one
That are you
Ninnu aa lahi hai (Ninnu is coming!) - Chubham
Where are you my sweet?

Lesson: Out of the hundreds of desks I looked at, this was the only love note that was to an actual person instead of a multinational company. Clearly that sort of thing is not really on these students' minds, or at least it is buried down deep. Maybe the prospect for many of an arranged marriage when they turn 27 is enough. This may be more representative of the typical attitude:

Girls stay away from them

On Population Density

So after much long pleading for visitors, they finally came. Our cousins arrived at the first of November, just in time for Diwali. After a week of settling in, we all decided that staying together would work out just fine and they are settled in for a 5-month stay.

The reaction that we get from most people when we tell them that our cousin and his wife and six children are staying with us for such a long time is typically "Wow," followed by a sympathetic, "So how are you doing?" like one would ask about a family tragedy or illness.

The honest truth is, and we are not just saying this because this is a public forum, is that it's wonderful. The kids have lots of playmates, we get paid in new furniture, the servants feel more useful, and Merinda and I get to hang out all the time with two people whom we have always truly looked up to and admired.



The reason that one might think this sort of thing would be difficult seems to be about population density. I woke up early this morning thinking about this and decided to get out my tape measure.

We have a 4-bedroom house, in which we occupy two bedrooms and our cousins occupy the other two. There is a big dining/living room and a kitchen. On occasion we had a college student named Zach crashing on the couch in the living room (and the ladies have a great story of him walking around in his tight bright green long-johns during Merinda's music class), but we won't count him or the days when other visitors are in town.

The 13 of us live in a house that is 1600 square feet. This works out to 123 square feet per person.

We also have a detached garage and above the garage there are two servants quarters. In one of the quarters, there lives Margaret, the cook, her daughter Pooja, who cleans for us, two other teenagers, Lakshmi and Shiva, and her husband Sunderaj. The other quarters are occupied by the driver, Anil, his wife Ritu, their two small children Anshul and Twinkle, a grandmother, and some other guy I think is a brother. They also frequently have other people staying with them as well, but we won't count them either. As a side note, since everybody, servants and all, have joined the Church, on a typical Sunday, 27% of the attendees are residents of our house.

The 11 of them live in the two quarters that are each 185 square feet, making about 34 square feet per person.

Before the cousins came each of us got about the space of the two servants' quarters, where there are now 11 people staying.

If we were to have the same population density as our servants did in our house, we could sleep 48 people. Needless to say, 13 isn't such a big deal at all.

In thinking about this and talking to our cousins, several thoughts come to mind. The way our servants are crowded into those quarters (which they seemed happy to have) is unfortunately not too far off from the way a lot of other people live here, especially in the cities, so it makes us grateful for the 123 square feet we each have.

It is also pretty sobering to think about the way we live and the shame it is that we really physically distance ourselves from each other in our standard way of living. Driving around lots of neighborhoods back home you see 3000 square foot homes with maybe only 3 or 4 people living inside (1000 square feet per person versus snuggling in with cousins at 123 or living like many good people here do with only 34). Lonely, huh?

Turkey Update!

Just for an update on Merinda's Turkey Article.

The smaller of the two turkeys the meat guy was able to sell for $30. The larger one remained in guy's freezer, unsold, for about a month and a half until Merinda gave up all hope and reclaimed her $60 turkey that is now sitting in our home.

The pictures don't do it justice. I'm not sure it is really a turkey. It looks more like some sort of small vulture to me. I would hate to have seen the "small one".

In spite of being scrawny, lopsided, totally freezer burned and who knows how many times thawed out due to power outages in that month in a half, we just couldn't let the guy throw away something so costly that belongs to us.

So now for a contest. We will solicit ideas for what to do with a possibly-inedible, disgusting, sixty-dollar, frozen turkey.

The winner will get a free massage or spa treatment when you come visit us for next Thanksgiving, when we will be surely eating a water-injected, factory-raised, smuggled-out-of the-embassy Butterball that came from the happy shores of the United States of the America.

Bumps, Eunuchs, Monkeys, and Posh Spice: The Latest Birthdays

Bumps: Dad's 33rd Birthday

At my office birthdays are a big deal. I don't know what other offices around here do but at ours, the order of things is:

1. Cut the cake. While cutting the cake everybody claps and sings "Happy Birthday".
2. Your nearest friends each grab a piece of the cake with their hands and feed you a bite.
3. Then they dot some of the cake on your forehead (like what you would see in a Hindu temple).
4. Then they smear the cake all over your face.
5. While you excuse yourself to wash the oily cake off your face, everybody has a piece.
6. For the brave guys, when you get back you get your bumps. (I think this may come from the British) One guy grabs your arms and another your legs and they bump you up and down.
   

Thankfully for them, they took off my glasses so I couldn't tell who to give a bad performance reviews.

This is me after the ritual:

Posh Spice: Merinda's 30th Birthday

A bunch of Merinda's friends led by Marcia put together a suprise 30th birthday party. She was completely surprised. Squeals of delight and total embarrassment.

It was fun getting together Merinda's "European/Australian" buddies, and her Mormon friends:
Here's Marcia, Lesley & Kerali. Marcia tried to mix it up so there was something for both groups--alcohol and party games.

This one was a game where you had to try and get people to guess what was written on their foreheads.
Unfortunately, Merinda is a bit behind on her popular culture. Even getting her to "British pop singer married to David Beckham" didn't get her the real answer....

Monkeys: Graham's 2nd Birthday

The first thing we did was went with Sister Glaris to the Delhi Zoo.

Since it was hotter than the blazes we blew up our little pool and let the kids run around. Our local monkey-wallah seems to have a sixth sense about when there is a birthday because it didn't take long before he came down the road on his bicycle with his monkeys beating the drum. So we let him in for a monkey show, which Graham completely enjoyed (here he's feeding the monkey a green bean).Here's Graham with the whole gang: Russell, Dad, Graham, Merinda, Isaac, Pooja, Lakshmi, Margaret, and Shiva. Was meant to be a family party, but "family" is a very fluid concept in India!
Eunuchs: Isaac's 7th Birthday

For Isaac's birthday we invited all of his classmates. I think all in all we had about 25 kids. The balloon man came, as usual and blew up around 100 balloons with his mouth. This time though we had an interesting addition to the party--a hijera! Here he/she is doing a little dance. They show up at big events and want you to pay them money to take away the evil spirits from your event. They're sort of like atonement figures, I guess. I think Rich gave them some money and they went on their way.

The theme for the party was magic, so we played "The Disappearing Kid" with toilet paper! This is Isaac magically making Yotam disappear. Isaac and Dad also did a pretty successful magic show with ropes that go through people and magical reading of cards and ipod speakers that magically turn on. Isaac was so excited for this part and has now enrolled in a magic class after school taught by a professor (of magic?) who tells the kids over and over never to do a trick more than once for someone. So Isaac's not getting much practice! But he's pretty good judging from the ONE time I've seen him do each trick . . .
Here's the cake that Merinda made herself with some help from Margaret at the beginning and end. I don't know why I keep insisting on making my own cakes because it makes me crazy and tense and I'm not even good at it. This one is supposed to be a magic hat with a bunny popping out. The hat collapsed though. :(
And that's all for the birthday season for the Cutlers. Stay tuned for more festivities at Diwali and Christmas!

The Most Amazing Breakfast Cereal EVER

So a couple of weekends ago Merinda sent me to the local grocery place and one of the things on the list was some breakfast cereal. To save a few rupees I picked up the local brand.

Just a disclaimer: It always bothers me when people mock foreigners trying to speak English. Let's give them credit, I mean, how good is your Hindi?

So grammer aside, just check out the wonderful things that this breakfast cereal can do. Here's the printing on the back:

Avee's Family Crunch Muesli
It's origin has been from Switzerland and other western countries, which proved magnificent results on mind, mood, physique, stamina, tummy, digestive system, tolerance, longitivity and general health. Hence the Avee's Family Crunch Muesli has much been appreciated and motivate the liking and love of maximum personalities of various spheres of life in the world.
Benefits
Avee's Family Crunch Muesli avoids dowdy or slacking & keeps one alert, smart, attractive, young, impressive and dominating. Being a most be-fitting low-fat-diet keeps a person ever ready to take up any task successfully any time of a day or night & produce outstanding results.
Gives stamina to devote more hours on work without break & without feeling dowdy or dour.
Least time consuming and is a perfect low fat diet and a fastest food available any time without much of struggle.
Boost vitimans, reduces cholesterol, maintains youth-fullness.
Taste & Consumption
Avee's Family Crunch Muesli consumption goes up for its delicious taste, health giving ingredients, life-long benefits, and facilitates fast food.
Fibre Editable Grains
Regular use of Avee's Family Crunch Muesli boosts appetite-an orderly healthy routine, maintains smart physique, stamina & sexual urge.

So of course I had to eat this stuff every day for a while. I mean long life? Good looks? Succeed in ANY task day or night? The very Fountain of Youth sitting before me in this box? Not to mention that bit at the end... How could you not eat it at any and all possible times?

As it turns out, the task was not easy. The stuff tasted like moist cardboard. Still, I did feel something different. The mystical renewing powers of this ancient land's breakfast cereal? Or just the power of positive thinking?

Happy Vishwakarma Puja!

Today, September 17 is Vishwakarma Puja. I was happy to learn that there is actually a Hindu God of Engineers. Vishwakarma is his name and he is supposed to have designed temples, palaces, missiles for ancient warfare, and the Universe.

One really neat thing here is the sense of the sacred that is everywhere. Today engineers and craftsmen stop and worship their tools. At our office a priest came into one of our labs and some offerings were made and prayers given:


Although not a Hindu myself, I think it's pretty neat that people stop and pay attention to what makes their livelihoods possible. Especially in my profession of engineering there is a lot of pride we take what we make.

Of course we never use our bare hands, we use tools and they came from somewhere. The next generation of computer chips are designed using computers that have in them the previous generation of computer chips running sophisticated software. The tools that are used to do what we do are the really astounding part of the whole deal. And those tools were in turn designed and built using other tools. And so on.

Once you take into account all the effort put into generations tools and infrastructure, one engineers' contribution to anything we build is but a small fraction of the overall effort.

And when considering our Maker who gave all those tens of thousands of people upon whose shoulders modern engineers stand their hands, minds, and inspiration, we can easily say that we do almost nothing. Just tiny little tweaks to move the whole thing forward.

So although taking a day for engineers to worship their tools might seem a bit funny to us, we should take that anytime over us engineers taking all the credit for our creations to ourselves!

Sacrament Meeting Talk in Leander Ward Dec. 2005

I'm tackling my piles of papers these days and found this talk I gave in our ward just before we moved. I thought I'd put it on the blog to preserve it and have a blast from the past.

December 18, 2005

Joseph Smith and the Proclamation on the Family

Introduction

Many of you know that we are moving to India at the end of this month. We are excited, sad, and terrified all at once. When I was in college I spent a semester in a rural village in Mexico teaching literacy to adults. Though I enjoyed it and probably did do some good, I often felt that I could do good more at home with my family who were struggling with various things at the time. So when this opportunity came to our family, I was grateful that now I have my own family and we are all going together. We may be disappointed by the amount of good we can do in India, but the influence we can have within our own family will remain unchanged.

My topic today is Joseph Smith, but I want to focus what I say about him around the Proclamation since President Jackson in Stake Conference urged us to “return to the Proclamation.” As I read through these journal entries compiled by Susan Easton Black, I was touched many times to see Joseph as a real person who got sick, who played with his family, who loved his wife. Though he pre-dated the Proclamation, he certainly lived each of its principles. Let me share some of these snapshots of his exemplary life with you while I bear testimony of the Proclamation.

I know that, as the Proclamation states, marriage between a man and woman is ordained of God.

November 24, 1835: Marriage is an institution of heaven, instituted in the Garden of Eden.

April 4, 1839: Dear and Affectionate Wife, I would gladly walk from here to you barefoot, and bare headed, and half naked, to see you.

January 20, 1840: My Dear Emma, my heart is intertwined around you and those little ones.

August 13, 1842: I was much rejoiced to meet my dear wife once again.

August 14, 1842: Spent the forenoon chiefly in conversation with Emma . . . both felt in good spirits and very cheerful.

Today is our anniversary! I am so grateful for a loving husband and for the commitment and joy that temple covenants bring. He is my best friend and so good to me.

I know that the family is central to the Creator’s plan. I know that the divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave.

Parley P. Pratt, Apostle, 1835–1857: It was Joseph Smith who taught me how to prize the endearing relationships of father and mother, husband and wife; of brother and sister, son and daughter. It was from him that I learned that the wife of my bosom might be secured to me for time and all eternity; and that the refined sympathies and affections which endeared us to each other emanated from the fountain of divine eternal love. . . . I had loved before, but I knew not why. But now I loved—with a pureness—an intensity of elevated, exalted feeling. Autobiography of Parley P. Pratt, ed. Parley P. Pratt Jr. (1938), 259–60.

April 16, 1843: In the morning of the first resurrection let me strike hands with my father.

March 20, 1842: The Lord takes many away, even in infancy, that they may escape the enemy of the man, and the sorrows and evils of this present world.

I know that we will see our loved ones who have gone before us to the Spirit World. I can’t wait to meet my dear loved ones there, and to join with many of my sisters in this ward and elsewhere in raising the children we only knew for a short time. I can’t wait to “meet Brother Joseph again.”

I know that parents have a sacred duty to . . . teach [their children] to love and serve one another

Joseph Smith: “It is a time-honored adage that love begets love. Let us pour forth love—show forth our kindness unto all mankind, and the Lord will reward us with everlasting increase; cast our bread upon the waters and we shall receive it after many days, increased to a hundredfold.”

September 1, 1835: Fathers should be kind to their children, husbands to their wives . . . children obedient to their parents.

September 14, 1843: My house has been a home and resting place for thousands.

June 25, 1844: Dear Emma, Myself and Hyrum have been again arrested for treason.

June 26, 1844: Could my brother, Hyrum but be liberated, it would not matter so much about me.

I learned a good lesson from my son Isaac recently. I said in passing one day, “Isaac, I need you!” Later in the day, he asked with a solemn face, “Mom, why do you need me?” I could tell he was flattered and excited at the thought that I might need him, and I started to think of all the reasons that I really do need and rely on him. We all need to be needed—allowing yourself to need someone strengthens the love between you.

I know that the family is ordained of God. I know that mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.

March 27, 1834: Remained at home and had great joy with my family.

I am so glad for the teachings of the Church that urge women to stay at home with their families. I have found the sweetest joys there as I watch my children grow and see the world through their eyes.

I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of faith.

August 31, 1842: Rode to the Grove with Emma, and attended the Female Relief Society’s meeting.

October 13, 1832: My Dear Wife, You must comfort yourself knowing that God is your friend in heaven and that you have one true and living friend on earth in your husband.

There is sweetness in sharing your faith with your children and your husband. I know that God is indeed my friend in heaven and my best friends on earth are in my family.

I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of prayer.

February 10, 1836: I asked my Heavenly Father in the name of Jesus Christ to heal my brother Hyrum, and bless my father’s family.

April 25, 1842: I was engaged in reading, meditation . . . mostly with my family.

January 16, 1834: O Lord! Keep us and my family safe, until I return to them.

January 28, 1836: I felt to praise God with a loud hosanna, for His goodness to me and my father’s family.

To me, being a mother is scary because so much can go wrong. I find solace in the fact that I can pray to Heavenly Father for the safety and well-being of my children, and rely on the Spirit to guide me as I care for them, and know that if something goes wrong, the Lord is mindful of us and will help it work together for our good.

I know that husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of compassion.

September 16, 1838: I was at home all day with my family.

September 8, 1843: My wife being sick, I was at home all day.

August 19, 1836: My beloved Wife: You may know that you and the children are much on my mind.

August 1, 1838: I tarried at home with my family . . . to refresh myself after many late fatigues and arduous duties.

July 13, 1843: I was in conversation with Emma most of the day.

March 24, 1832: I told Emma, she had better retire to rest . . . I would watch with the sicker child.

February 26, 1843: My mother was sick with inflammation of the lungs, and I nursed her with my own hands.

I am so grateful for a husband who, like Joseph, cares for me and my children with his own hands—changing diapers, staying home to help, fixing and building things, laying hands upon our heads. He is sensitive and thoughtful, faithful and strong.

I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of respect.

August 22, 1842: I have thought of my father who is dead . . . he was a great and a good man.

August 23, 1842: I loved my father and his memory; and the memory of his noble deeds.

My father-in-law often thanks Heavenly Father in his prayers for those who have gone before us. I hope we can be as Joseph Smith and retain in our memory our ancestors and our indebtedness to them.

I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of work.

June 4, 1842: My Dear Companion, we all enjoy the fruits of our labour if we hold out faithful to the end which I pray may be the happy lot of us all.

May 13, 1842: Spent most of the day in my garden with my family.

March 9, 1842: Continued translating and revising, and reading letters in the evening, Sister Emma being present in the office.

Some of my sweetest memories with our family and our ward family center around working together. There is great joy in working and serving together. I am so grateful to have worked and served with you.

I know that successful marriages and families are established on the principle of wholesome recreational activities.

September 4, 1834: Circus performance, which I attended with my family.

February 8, 1843: At four in the afternoon, I went out with my little Frederick, to exercise myself by sliding on the ice.

July 21, 1843: Rode to the farm with my daughter Julia.

June 3, 1843: This morning, I, with my family . . . started for Quincy, on a pleasure voyage.

March 18, 1843: Played ball with the boys.

My father, too, was always good at finding time for wholesome recreational activities with his family. I always knew Daddy worked hard at work, and then came home to play with us. We’d wrestle around with him, play outside, take fun and cheap family vacations (which usually included camping and hiking!), and share silly made-up stories.

I know that by divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families.

March 25, 1839: There are many teachers, but, perhaps, not many fathers.

September 9, 1842: I offered a blessing upon the heads of my sleeping children.

July 6, 1842: Transacted business in the city, and rode to LaHarpe with Emma.

May 28, 1842: Walked to the store with Emma, transacted some business in the city.

March 3, 1834: O Lord, bless my little children with health and long life, to do good in their generation.

March 5, 1843: I stayed home all day to take care of my mother, who was still sick.

It’s tricky to balance work and home, and it appears from Joseph’s writing that he did a pretty good job of it, despite his busy schedule. He seemed to always be willing to take time out from work to help family members in need, and included his family in his work when he could.

My Testimony

I am grateful for Joseph Smith. I am excited to meet him in the next life and shake his hand, thanking him for all he did for us. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God who was bold enough to restore the Gospel on the earth and spread it throughout the earth. I am so grateful for that.

President Hinckley said, “Joseph Smith set in motion a program for carrying the gospel to the nations of the earth. I marvel at the boldness with which he moved. Even in the infant days of the Church, in times of dark adversity, men were called to leave homes and families, to cross the sea, to proclaim the Restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ. The Prophet’s mind, his vision encompassed the entire earth.”

I am grateful that our family has the opportunity to cross many seas and do our best to build the kingdom in India. I wish we didn’t have to leave our home and ward family to do it! But I am grateful that I can go with my little eternal family and that as we rely on each other and serve together, we will find joy that can only come together as a family. Please come visit us, and we’ll come back to visit you.

I know God lives and loves us and had a plan for us. I know our Savior Jesus Christ lives and was resurrected and suffered so that we may live forever and return to His presence. I know Joseph Smith was a prophet of God and that he saw God the Father and His Son and translated the Book of Mormon, the word of God. I know this is the only true church on the face of the earth because of its awesome priesthood authority from Jesus Christ. I am grateful for the peace and joy that my testimony brings me and my family.

Isaac's 6th Birthday Party (23 September 2006--Better Late Than Never!)

The balloon man. He showed up a few hours before the party and blew up 200 or so balloons FAST with no special tools but his own mouth and CO2. Russell was mesmerized and then the two became great friends.
The balloon man stayed and did balloon sculptures. This is Hiroya (from Japan) and Yeryeon (from Korea) who are both in Isaac's KG class.
Mariam, Isaac's best friend in his ECEC4 class last year.Janya, one of Isaac's newest friends in his KG class this year.
Tom, his oldest and best friend. He's from Australia, but more recently from China, so Isaac often tells people his best friend is Chinese!
Russell hugging his best friend Ellie Joyce (Tom's sister).
Isaac the Birthday Boy wearing a crown he made for himself during "choices time" at school.What was supposed to be a rocket party (a repeat from last year, since, as Isaac said, "I don't have any of the same friends this year, so they won't mind!") evolved into a balloon party when Rich threw down the "rocket" balloons from the roof, filled with a bit of dal (lentils).
The view from the roof of the party as it was warming up . . .Margaret, our housekeeper, and her daughter who helps her Poojah helped to make all of this happen.Margaret and Poojah quietly cleaned up most of the party as we were socializing with lingering guests. We could definitely get used to some of these perks of living in a third-world country!
Playing musical chairs using foam squares.
Russell covered in cocoa after helping make the frosting for the birthday cake!
Graham getting spoiled again by Margaret while Mommy was in the midst of decorating the cake ("Don't worry Mommy," said Isaac, "I'm sure it will look exactly like the one Grandma did!" A tall order . . .)
After much stress, the cake didn't turn out all that bad. As requested, it did look pretty much like last year's cake.Isaac, on the other hand, seems like a completely different boy from last year. So much bigger and wiser and more confident. I love this photo because you can see on his face how very special he felt, but he was trying to maintain a "cool" look on his face despite the urge to grin. So grown up!

The birthday boy and his proud parents (with a dad who is the birthday dad extraordinaire!)
Graham-bam loves to pose for the camera!!
Playing with the spoils from the party afterwards . . . a Hot Wheels set from Tom!