Dengue Doom Done

Two months ago I caught the dreaded dengue fever. Here is the story. . .

The city of Delhi had been all abuzz about how many cases of dengue there were in the city, how many people were dying, etc. Rich's work party was cancelled to help us all avoid getting it. I was getting SMS messages on my mobile phone from Airtel with tips on how to avoid dengue. You get the idea.

So, when I came down with a fever on 19 October, the day after my Seven Cities presentation, I was a bit worried. Then when my eyes started burning and the fever wouldn't go away I started to feel this impending doom. Did I have the dreaded dengue? How could I be so stupid? I was always dousing the kids with mosquito repellant, but often left myself out of the fun (dengue spreads only through mosquitos).

Then, as I deal with many dilemmas, I started reading about it . . . on the Internet. Luckily, unlike what usually happens when you read up on diseases on the Internet, it didn't sound all that bad. Most sources said you can treat the thing at home. So I waited in my bed for the fever to break. Margaret took care of the kids. Diwali (the Festival of Lights) came and went and I laid in bed most of the time listening to the fireworks, feeling really weird. I read lots of books, including Grandma Funk's book written by Aunt Nancy. Really good reading. I missed Isaac's big United Nations Day Program. Still had a fever.

Finally we went to a doctor Monday, 23 October, and he ordered a blood test and bed rest. By that time I had really achy muscles, and could barely walk up and down the stairs. Felt like I'd run a race, even though I'd been in bed for days. I remember really well we had to take a taxi to get to the doctor and there were several mosquitos flying around in it. Inescapable. Why did I end up being the unlucky one? The weird thing is that I don't even remember having a mosquito bite when I would have been infected.

Anyway, the doctor we had seen was the first one we could get in to at the Max Clinic and we didn't like him much, so we decided to go see our doctor Dr. Monica Mahajan Tuesday, 24 October and see what the blood test results were. She noted some rashes developing on my neck and trunk, and though the blood test still didn't show dengue she suggested I be admitted to the hospital to monitor my platelet count and keep me hydrated. Yuck! I really didn't want to go, but Rich thought it was a good idea, so we agreed. When we got home to get our stuff and say goodbye to the kids I started to get numb in my fingers and hands and started to think maybe this was a good idea after all.

I was in the hospital poked and prodded and bound to my bed for 5 days--the Max Super Specialty Hospital at Saket. The hospital was brand new and very nice. One day they took me downstairs for an ultrasound of my kidneys with a fancy new machine. Later I found out that this hospital is one of the popular ones for the medical tourism that has become so popular lately. People find that it's much cheaper and pretty much equal to travel to India for a big operation or something. Having stayed there as a resident of Delhi, I just don't think it's a good idea. I already feel rather adjusted to India and was stressed about the food and cleanliness. I can't imagine how I would be if I had just flown in for an operation. But whatever floats people's boats. But I digress . . .

The fever finally broke on the 4th day I was there. The IV I was attached to most of the time helped to keep the fever down and made up for the small amount I was eating, partly because of the illness and partly because I was worried about eating the food.

The day after I arrived I started getting the full-on rash and swelling--the very worst part. My hands and feet swelled up to about double their size (almost couldn't get my rings off) and my feet were huge and felt like I was walking on pins and needles if I got up. Most of my body was covered with this bright red, itchy rash. Yuck! So there I was laying in a really uncomfortable hospital bed, mostly sleeping fitfully for days. Rich luckily had a bunch of days off for Diwali, so he faithfully stayed with me during the days and went home to the kids at night.

There's something about having a fever for so long that starts to make you feel a bit crazy. I wondered if it would ever go away. At one point I remember talking to the fever, telling it that I didn't invite it and would it please leave! I knew that once my fever broke and my platelet counts stayed within the normal not-scary range (which they did) I could go home, which was all I wanted once I started feeling better. The kids weren't allowed to visit in the hospital, but Graham came once or twice a day to breastfeed and Isaac and Russell visited once. I missed them so much!

The fever did finally break on Friday, 27 October so Saturday I was released to go home. I did finally test positive for dengue on that morning's blood test. Hooray! I survived! The icky thing I have to worry about now, they say, is that if I get dengue again next year (it's a seasonal thing), it will likely be worse. I'll be better about my mosquito repellant next year, for sure.

The very best result from all of this dengue mess is that my parents got so worried about me that they showed up! They arrived here on 31 October and stayed two weeks. It was great to have them here while I regained my strength. Nothing beats having your Mom and Dad around when life gets really hard. They both played with the kids for hours, told me to go to bed and get my rest, and even washed dishes and cooked.
Dengue didn't kill me, it just stole about 3 weeks of my life from me. Some people ask why, after experiencing dengue, we aren't running back to the USA. I guess that might be the wise thing to do. But we knew when we signed up to live in India that it was risky. Life is anywhere. We also knew (and still know) that this is the right place for our family to be right now, for whatever reason. Dengue didn't kill me, so it must have made me a better (not bitter!) person.

Easter with Mom

The Easter Egg Hunt in the garden with Mr. RK Singh (the guard) helping. A few days ago we found out this guy was taking bribes so we sent him away. But he sure enjoyed this hunt, as you can see.

Notice how sick Nana looks. So sad. Try as she might, she could not get out of bed to go to church this morning, but she did get out later to try to join in the other Easter activities. Poor Nana!

Graham's first Easter was visibly successful. Just give the kid something to sink his two tiny teeth into and he'll give you a winning grin in return!

Another Day in the Life of Mindy

7:00 pm (night before--to get the full picture we must start here...) I fall asleep on the floor while giving the FHE lesson. I've been totally exhausted fighting whatever disease my body has. I vaguely hear Rich and the kids pop popcorn and go to bed.

1:00 am I wake up and take out my contacts. Can't sleep because I'm still coughing and have been for over a month. I drink some herbal tea and read "A Joyful Mother of Children" by Linda Eyre for a bit. I realize that many of my frustrations are not unique to India and maybe I could get over this cough and feel better about life in general if I got some exercise.

6:00 am I wake up and tell myself I'm going to get up and take a walk. Fall back to sleep

6:45 am Isaac crawls in bed with us (next to Graham who joined us some time in the wee hours). I try to get out of bed and go for a walk without anyone noticing. Isaac asks where I'm going. "For a walk," I say. "Can I come?" I tell him he can if he gets ready in time. He does in lightning speed and we take a short walk.

7:00 am I come home to Russell nearly hyperventilating because he's been crying the whole time we were gone. "I wanted (sniff sniff) to go with Ma-Maaaaa."

7:15 am Russell and I go for a walk. I carry him most of the way. It's already getting hot. We see two dog fights on the way.

7:30 We eat breakfast. Oatmeal.

7:45 I realize I no longer have time for a shower and try to make myself look presentable enough anyway. Can't put my contacts in because one eye is too swollen. Maybe too much sleep?

7:55 Isaac and I go off to school leaving Rich with the sobbing Russell in his arms: "I want to go with Ma-Maaaaa!"

8:30 Drop Isaac off at school

8:40 Sign up Russell and Isaac for Saturday Swim Classes. I put them in the same class, mostly for logistical purposes. It's called Water Exploration, so surely they can both handle it.

9:00-10:00 Hindi Class. I learn how to say "Do Not Disturb" in Hindi: "Disturb nahee carriega." Good to know.

10:00-11:00 Wait for the driver to arrive outside the school on a bench while I worry about the kids at home with Sarita. Feel very guilty that I'm just sitting here while I could be at home taking care of my kids. Wonder if the Hindi class is such a good idea.

11:00-12:00 Go to Marcia's House for a coffee hour. I don't drink the coffee and wait for the kids to arrive with Sarita.

12:00-12:30 The kids arrive. Russell has a poopy diaper that's soaked through because he won't let Sarita change it. I get him all cleaned up and into Isaac's pants (which Sarita had mistakenly brought along). He won't take them off all day, insisting they are his pants as he pulls them up for the thousandth time!).

12:30-1:30 We all go shopping together. Try for the third time to get into a shop called Basix that supposedly sells the only sofa beds in the city. The first time I tried to go it was closed for this strike against the government because they're tearing down buildings that aren't built to code. The second time I tried to go it was closed. On this third attempt today I find that the government had "sealed" the shop so not even the owner can get in! When I call the owner to see if it will open again, he assures me it will be "de-sealed" by tomorrow. We'll see . . . Meantime, Mom's prospect of a bed apart from an air mattress is looking dismal.

1:30-2:15 Go to the doctor to see why I'm still coughing after 1 month and two rounds of antibiotics. I don't realize until I cart the kids in and get checked in that I don't have any rupees to pay for the visit and Rich has my ATM card. I walk away frustrated. I try to change my US dollars at a nearby bank, but they don't do that there, of course. Realize I won't have time to see the doctor anyway once I try another bank, so I give up and go get Isaac.

2:00-2:30 Pick up Isaac at a playdate at a Korean classmate's house. His mom said (in broken English) she wanted Isaac over to help her son practice his English. When I arrive they are watching Harry Potter and eating pizza and there's another Korean classmate there. Isaac looks scared and/or bored. I rush him out of there as fast as I can. Isaac tells me in the car they didn't wear seatbelts on the way home from school. I say, "That's not really safe," and don't really know what else to say. Most Indian cars don't even have seat belts in the back seat. How can I require my kids to wear seat belts if they aren't even there?

2:30-3:00 Drive home. As we get out of the car the guard informs us that the garbage man will no longer pick up our garbage because it's too smelly (from our diapers--I guess we have more of them than most since we don't let our kids poop in the street). I wonder what we'll do if nobody will pick up our garbage . . .

3:00 Find that Sudhir has put two really wet and soapy rugs in the dryer and the whole mess is sloshing around in there. I ask him what this is and he looks at me blankly. I send them off on their lunch break and try to fix the mess. Just after they leave I find a square burned onto the wooden table in the kitchen hiding under a muffin tray. Make a mental note to ask Sarita about that one. This sort of stuff must be what Claudia was talking about when she kept telling me not to let them near anything you couldn't handle being broken or ruined.

3:00-3:30 Isaac lays on the rug at my feet while I feed the baby. "Mom, what does settled mean? Are we settled yet?" Everyone here seems to ask that question: "Are you settled yet?" I think for a minute, then say, "Isaac, I think settled means you feel like this is home. Do you feel that way yet?" "Yes," he says, and runs off to play. I'm so happy to hear he feels settled!

4:00-6:00 Feel too exhausted to face the projects and staff angst at home, so I decide to go to the Australian-New Zealand Mom's Group (they let Americans come as long as they aren't too obnoxious!). There's about 20 kids there, 12 moms, 3 ayahs (nannies). The "bag man" comes to show us all the designer leather bags he can make. I watch nearly all of the moms order a bag while I feed Graham baby food and try to fight fires with the kids. This bag man has funky colors, cool designs, all for $20-30. I think about how I still need to buy a generator and come up with more space for storing clothes and choose curtain fabric before I start thinking about bags. Besides, Rich would kill me if I came home with another bag!

6:00 Come home and make Mac and Cheese for the kids. I'm trying to gorge them on it before it expires in hopes that they'll be so sick of it they won't want it anymore once it's gone! Not sure if it will work. I don't plan on telling them we can get it here for $5 a box!

7:00 Find that Sarita and Sudhir have written angry messages in their time card book because we didn't pay them the way they wanted. Stew about that one while I get the kids ready for bed.

8:00 Sit down and try to figure out what is going on with Sarita and Sudhir and try to work out a workable solution. Graham wakes up and joins me on the floor nearby--he will sit happily forever chewing on a toy and then suddenly switch to the tummy-down position and zoom off in search of something better. His favorite things to head for are electrical outlets, of course!

9:00 Rich comes home and makes me toasted tuna and cheese sandwiches and offers good advice about dealing with Sarita and Sudhir. He lays down on the rug beside me and falls asleep.



I wrote all this down thinking that it would illustrate what a terrible day I had. Once it all came out, it wasn't all that bad. It turns out that I have bronchitis, so perhaps my feeling for the day was colored by the infection and exhaustion a bit. Anyway, it's a good life. In the end, the kids make life so joyful no matter where we live, as long as I step back from the mayhem and recognize it!